Even more variety

Just an update....my husband has been move to a rehab unit 40 miles away....!! I get the feeling that his life is well out my control now and I will have to stop thinking otherwise.
The distance means that I shall only be able to visit once or twice a week but I know that he is in good hands. 

In the meantime, I need to get on with my work and create the income that will support us both.
This ageing  stuff is not too good when you are ill, so maybe we should take ourselves in hand and be healthy up to death. I have a friend in Lincolnshire who is in her late 70's and watches what she eats and takes a walk every day. Her philsophy is to 'die healthy' maybe that is what we all should aim for.

My next task is to get an Enduring Power of Attorney set up for me, will make life easier for my family. 

Variety in life is good?

We don’t like to be bored but there are times when constant variety can wear one down.

My husband, who is already ill with Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s , broke his hip just over two weeks ago. That put him in our local general hospital, as I write, now for just over two weeks.  I started to go and visit every day at lunch time, not the official visiting time but to take on the job of assisting him with eating his lunch, to do his shave and generally to help. Visiting at any other time would not be so productive and as there is no conversation, what do you do?

Now he is being moved to a rehabilitation unit, a 20 plus mile round trip away from me. After that he will be assessed and moved again to a nursing home that can cope with his complex needs, where I have no idea. It’s all about where there is a bed space.

During this time I have adapted, not very well in the first few days, as his recovery from the hip operation was touch and go, but adapt I have had to do. I was tapping pretty constantly, which alleviated much of the emotional pain and kept me grounded; in fact I had to resort to using the finger points and imagination as my face got quite tender!!

During all this, there were times when I missed a planned trip to visit my family in London and the stamina to  keep up my EFT coaching practice, but more important, some days I was unable to even think straight.

But in two weeks the trips to hospital have become routine as I have got to know the nurses and staff. Peter’s little side room has become his world and as he has gained strength, mostly feeding himself now and  is looking at the young nurses with a glint in his eye.

So yet again all change……I will not be able to just pop in to see him at the new hospital, so will have to ration my visits, he will not know or understand but I will.

It makes you think!

Just been reading Pat's blog, Wise Woman Travels, her idea is amazing and I am sure it would make her very happy....it makes me think about what I may like to do.
If there was nothing to stop me and I had enough money, what would I do? I expect you have thought this at times. We get stuck into routines and with people that we may not have chosen if we had know how it would make us feel. With EFT of course we can help ourselves to come to terms with our feelings but not subjugate them, we have to know what our true feelings are.

For instance, would you be doing what you do now to earn money, if you had had other opportunities years ago? In retrospect would you have trained to do something else? Hindsight is wonderful…..if I knew then what I know now……but we didn’t so the journey goes on.

But as Pat can show us, is it never too late to do something new, take up a challenge and make a difference to your life and in many cases to the lives of others as well.

My deliberations continue; do I love what I do (because that’s the only way to be happy) or am I doing it for other reasons and does it make me happy anyway?

I just have to remember the wonderful Christmas Cards from clients, the testimonials and outpouring of love;  the ‘Thanks You’ for what I do, so all I have to do right now is  Keep Calm and Carry On….just like my daughters poster in her kitchen. Though there may be a time when my journey takes me in another direction and I think that prospect is exciting, so good on you Pat, get that camper van and take on the world…or the UK anyway!!

My morning walk 7th Jan 2010

Just had a reminder that we can find beauty in everything and nature, raw, cold and just plain amazing! My walk this morning with CJ…he is the one in the blue coat!!

The new year bulge!

"On no" I cried, as I stood on the scales after Christmas. That half stone I lost has now reappeared. I suppose if I had not lost the weight before, I would now be a stone heavier....some consolation.....!
I think this is the most common issue of January, that and having to pay the credit cards. 
It's not that I ate too much, oh no...just sat about more. But in reality my carbohydrate consumption was up. More sugar, pastry…..all those lovely mince pies...roast potatoes and parsnips etc. It's no bad thing to have an occasional treat and lapse in good eating habits and I know that in a couple of weeks, being careful of course, that the extra few pounds will go again.
Fortunately I have a target to aim for, the workshop at The EFT Gathering at the end of the month. I don’t want to look bulging and fat; I wish to feel good about myself, my appearance as well as my skills. Self confidence and self esteem are hard won areas in my life and now, though I am content with who I am, I still wish to present a good image to the world. This is not being egocentric but being the person who practices what they preach.
For instance chocolate no longer has a hold over me, and I know that EFT helps me on more than those occasions. So being an EFT and natural health practitioner encourages me to walk the talk….so less input and more output….energy that is.
Welcome to a healthy 2010!

Changing perspectives and food waste

For my readers who have been asking about my change in diet which I wrote about in November, here is an update.  You may recall that I gave up all meat, fish and eggs (had already not eaten dairy food for a long time) and alcohol. This did me me a great boost, though I found that it was not easy to stick to as I am a busy person and often out and about. Over the last week or so, tiredness and the cold had started to get to me and the choice of vegetables (local and in season) were getting rather boring. Also to compensate I was eating far too much carbohydrate; bread...I love toast....fried potatoes and just more in quantity that was good for me.

So I introduced a little more protein in the form of organic eggs and sustainable fish into my diet, also allowing myself some imported vegetables. This seems to have done the trick and my energy level are returning. It seems that even at my age I do need some high quality protein; pulses and nuts just don't always hit the spot! Tofu is another blog...
It makes me wonder how my parents generation managed during the war, when boring food was the only food and they had no choice, plus quantities were always small and nothing was wasted. No wonder most people at that time were at their healthiest.

I am sure that food shortages will return, not because of war I hope but because there are too many people on earth to feed the way we in the west think we should eat. Therefore, when I come across waste it causes a real angst within me. This festive season please don't overbuy, use up leftovers and be thankful, for this bounty cannot last for ever.

Grandchildren and the passing of time!

My eldest grandchild, James is 20 today. I find this a little disturbing to put it mildly. He is a grown up (has been for a while really) goes to work and leads an interesting and young man about town type of life.
His father Simon was 23 when James was born, I was 21 when I gave birth to Simon. At the other end of the spectrum my daughters children are aged 6 and 2 so these little girls will continue to be children for a good few years yet. In the middle, Simon has another son, now into his early teens who at the moment fits with neither end of children in the family. Fortunately he is well adjusted and has many friends of his own age.

My sister and I are seven years apart and had many years with very little in common and in fact little contact. Then when time evened up our ages we met again, this time on a different level and became the very best of friends. Time changes our response to people of all ages, so if you are having a rough time with family or friends, just give it time.

The increase in anxiety as we count down!

Have you noticed that people are becoming more anxious than usual? It seems OK to most people that around this time of the year we build up to the festive season with the frantic round of shopping and parties, in most cases to drop and often succumb to illness during the time off.

Why not make this year different. Do it slower, spend less money and enjoy every day. After all for most people, Christmas or whatever you wish to celebrate during the winter solstice season, is just another day to survive. Think of the homeless, the jobless and children who will receive very little this year. Think of the planet and the waste that we will all be part of.

Let this year be the first one that we can all say "I tried to be a better person" rather than "I want". This very change of emphasis will reduce your anxiety, bring down your blood pressure and save you three weeks of worry.

Red Roses

I have just received a bunch of roses, red roses and not from a man! It's a late birthday present from an old girl friend, one I don't see much of but one I talk to every few days. We have a great friendship and as we both get older we value this highly.

This is just a reminder that not all friendships depend on face to face contact, coffee round the kitchen table or a bottle of wine over lunch, some long distance onces are just as important though sometimes it needs just a little more focus.

The one thing to remember is to listen. It's a good idea to take on the other persons news first, then have your say, or the temptation is to talk over each other and never 'hear' anything. Communication, that's all it is, but communication with love, patience and commitment.

Money saving & health promoting!!

Over a few months during the summer, I had started to feel my age a bit (not like me at all) so gradually I took myself in hand. First I cut out all food derived from animals; meat, fish, dairy and eggs (I was buying as much organic as possible) also alcohol which I had already reserved for weekends only. I lost half a stone over about six weeks and started to feel heaps better.

But the best thing is this....I am saving around £100 a month! I live alone with a small dog and my average monthly food bills were approximately £170, mainly due to paying the organic premium for meat and maybe the red wine! My food cost are now around £75 and I live very well. Vegetables and fruits in season are cheap, even the organic ones when I can get them. I eat pulses, my favorite meal is Dahl and rice with vegetables curry, nuts and a small amount of tofu for protein. I have not been a great dairy fan for years as I found it aggravated my lungs and created mucus, so this is no great loss.

Understanding the 'Save the Planet' argument for meat reduction also gives me a feeling of helping out; less pollution, less factory farming, less cruelty and much less additives and chemicals in my diet.

Next project is to get more exercise; may even join a gym again!

If you are interested in finding out more, please contact me....together we could change the world or at least get a bit healthier.

Jasper the barking dog

Since the workshop with Gwyneth and learning more about working with animals, I have been doing some surrogate work on Jasper a dog that is walked by my Pet Services friend Emma. He barks constantly and is very naughty and unresponsive.

I have been tapping for him to calm down and to stop him barking at everything, especially horses that pass his home. When this has worked I will start on his other behavioral issues. I will let you know the results as I get them....nothing so far but it's very early days.

To have an impact on animals I feel I should also work with the owners, so if the results are not conclusive I hope to get to see the humans in this equation.

It's quite a strange feeling to find that through EFT my intuition has become heightened, when I 'get into' Jasper I get feelings that belong to him. He sort of tells me how he feels, for instance I can tell that he feels lonely and barking gets him noticed. He feels neglected, as his owners are busy people and he has no companions at home, though for three days a week he is with Emma and lots of other dogs. His routine therefore, is different every day and animals like us, prefer some routine to feel grounded and safe.

We also need to remember that animals have less memory function than we do, have no knowledge of our language and have different survival mechanisms. Having said that, my dog CJ understands everything I say, is totally obedient (given that treats are around) and is flexible with his routine as he is secure that his owner and home are still there to come back to.

When he has been to Emma's for a few days, as I have to go away sometimes, he spends the next two days mostly asleep as being with other dogs is both exhilarating and exhausting!

New EFT ideas and working with animals

Patricia and I have recently spent a weekend in Ilkley with Gwyneth Moss (EFT Master) doing new stuff and keeping up to date with developments in the EFT world. I love going to Yorkshire anyway as the area is just so beautiful.

One of the topics we covered was working with animals and I have always know that some practitioners do this but just never had the belief that I could. So it was a revelation that this works so well and so quickly.

I am now sending leaflets to my pet services pal Emma in the hopes that I can try out my new techniques with some of her more wayward customers, the dogs that is, though I do think working with the owners as well would be a great help. The energy between owner and pet is the link to many behavioral issues and stress in the animal may be the cause of illness just as it for us.

We also did some remarkable stuff with humans which I have been putting into practice with my clients so far this week, they were amazed and I have to say so was I. In fact even after all this time working with EFT I have to say that I am constantly awe struck at what it can do.

It can't be next year yet?

Last week I was sent forms to complete from one of the Holistic Centers where I run workshops. The dates were for the early spring brochure, January to April 2010 and it kind of threw me for a while. With the weather being so kind that week, the clocks not gone back and my November birthday still weeks off, it's hard to start thinking about next year.

I am aware that I should have started my planning when I told everyone else to, but being me I was just too busy, so I had to get a real move on and decide what I wanted to teach and how best I could deliver that teaching.

My weekend therefore was spent trying out concepts, thinking about workshop content and visualizing the delegates. The forms went off this morning by email all filled in and now all I do is wait until the dates I requested are sanctioned, the brochure printed and distributed and people express an interest in my offerings...or not!!

This year, though I had several workshops and courses planned, many were cancelled due to lack of interest. Like many of my friends who are therapists, we have all had a lean time during the recession, so lets hope that now things are more positive, people will feel more comfortable spending a little on their personal development and health. After all, that is the most important thing in life.....but that's only my opinion of course!

The knowledge of age

I am loving this getting older business...!! I sometimes wish I had had some of this wisdom and stuff many years ago but hey ho...not to be... but I am getting it now!

There may be creases in my face, laughter lines Mum used to call them and my body maybe showing signs of traveling south without asking me first, but life is good. I do have to remind myself sometimes as I am not always in the right place but wow, how good it is when I am.

This a wonderful, sepia tint of my mother when she was about 18, no creases at that time!

There are times when I get down and fed up but I try to accept that it is just how I feel then and that I am OK really...and I do love and accept myself... and I tap. EFT is a calmer, a tool for every day not just for when we think we need it or even remember. The time you most need EFT is when you are stressed and most likely to forget. Tap as a part of life and see what it can do for you.

The closeness of friendship when it's needed most

I have just had a long conversation with an old friend Margaret, who was bereaved last November. This very close family lost a husband, a father and a grandfather and she lost her best friend.

It happens, death and taxes as they say... the only certainty in life. It makes it no less traumatic when it is expected; in this instance John died after fighting cancer for over two years, now my caring friend is left without a person to care for, or one to share her life, so the empty space looms large and a little daunting.

She has her family for support and has been to see cousins in Australia, traveling alone for the first time in her life. She learned to swim, snorkeled on the Great Barrier Reef and drove herself around city's and towns she did not know. She is justifiably very proud of herself.

She called to tell me all about her new life and ask about mine. We shared notes as old friends do, I have not seen her for many years nor do I plan to. Friendship that relies on constant feeding can be tiring and not always a two way trade. This one rests on the knowledge that we are just there; we can just pick up the phone and we as as we were, friends with a shared past, a spiritual connection and hopefully a long future .....so good to know.

We will be there for each other and all our friends providing the best support we can when needed. Just reminded me to be thankful for my wonderful support system of family and friends; thank you all for just being there.

Changes and more changes!

I am sure that all my readers are aware that change is the only certainty in life!

Well I have just had to change the date for the Carers of Loved ones with Dementia workshop. Had so much interest "Wow what a great idea!" but just not enough people booked in. So instead of this Sunday 4th October it's now Sunday 8th November.

This workshop is designed to help take away the uncertainty, pain and grief that carers experience when a family member or close friend slides remorselessly into dementia of any kind.

Tomorrow the 2nd October is my wedding anniversary and I will celebrate with my husband, knowing that it means nothing to him as he fixates on the tissue in his hands, folding it ever smaller, unfolding and refolding it.

I will choose to remember the best of the 25 years we have shared and tell him stories about the good times; the children, grandchildren, sailing and narrow boating that he loved so much.

By remaining busy, seeing two clients, lunching with a girl friend (always good for a giggle) as well as spending an hour or so with Peter, will mark the day for me in a very positive way....as I flow with my ever changing life.

Embrace the changes, roll with punches and laugh as much as you can.

Another week gone!

I can't believe how fast life is traveling. Friday already and next week is almost booked up with clients for EFT and even some for accounts and business mentoring. I love the variety of work that I do but it makes for anxious moments when I forget a persons name.

This morning I attended, briefly, a McMillan coffee morning being run by my Forever Living friends and forgot one of the girls names...it just would not come and I know her so well. This could be my age of course or maybe just so much to do.

My EFT therapy work is going very well and I am working on a half day workshop for 'The Gathering' in Ilkley at the and of January. This was well attended last year where I did a one hour presentation, this time a little longer so I need to get my head in gear. The details are needed now to go on the web site. I will let you know more about this when the site is functioning.

As you may know I do a considerable amount of work with relationships and families, so that is what the workshop will be based on. It's more about hearing each other, listening to the 'Story' that we all tell and caring enough not to make judgments but to learn loving strategies to cope with life's ups and downs.

Internal anger and pain

In my daily life I take my dog out for a walk early in the morning then again, when I am working at home, about 10.30 for a real walk. Often we meet a man and his dog, he is maybe in his late 60's and over the years we have always stopped to chat. Should I say HE has always chatted; chatted is the wrong word, he talks at me.

I call him Mr Actually, as he has an actual wife, the actual plumber, the actual rain!!! He also is the most depressing person to be around, constantly moaning. He has such internal pain and anger it seems to consume him, this of course makes more pain. Yesterday he moaned about the weather, "It's cold now and will rain" he said (At the time it was warm and dry). I suggested that we were having a nice day......."Why are you so lucky?" he said. More of this in the next Newsletter.

There are many people who find it difficult to listen, they are filled with 'Their Story' and are identified by it. If you have an uplifting story then please share it, if your life is depressing and you feel unloved, unlucky and beset with problems then the best remedy is to be quite and listen. Listen to the real inner voice and not the constant chattering that your story makes.

Find a way to learn EFT and lift your spirits, have a new perspective on life and move into loving yourself and every moment as it comes. Acceptance, love and forgiveness are the three main stepping stones to a happy and joyful life.

Have a happy day!

New Working Year

I attended the launch of Tewkesbury 4 Networking breakfast meeting on Wednesday this week. It was well attended with familiar and new faces; one guy, our local printer said 'Happy New Year...now the children are going back to school and that holidays have been taken or booked, there is a window of opportunity in which to work hard and move your business forward'.

How right he is, I hear on the radio that 'Christmas' is already on sale in department stores all over the county! Pleeeease... give me a break....another year will go quickly enough.

My therapy business is really busy again, I think people are sick of the recession and are spending on their health. There is an underlying need to feel well and happy so they try EFT rather than drugs; quite right too. I am running a workshop on the 4th October for 'Carers of loved ones with Dementia' you will be aware that I have intimate knowledge in this area, so please get in touch if you are interested in taking part in this one or those to follow around the country.

This next few months I am also gearing up my business 2 business company, with more coaching and EFT of course and even some special cost saving solutions for cash strapped businesses in my area. So much to do, so little time....well it keeps me young!

Wish me luck for the New Business Year...it's still ages until Christmas.

Family Weekend

I have just had a lovely weekend with my family. All three of my children in the same place at the same time, unusual for us as one of my sons lives in Thailand. We also got all but one of the grandchildren together for a day at Heaver Castle in Kent. Quite splendid with loads of Tudor history that I would like to read up about, in fact I may go back when I am on my own as touring a castle with a six year old and a two year old was fast...!!!

The reason we were all together really was for the birthday party of the 6 year old...and a very special day on Saturday when she had her friends round for tea in the garden.

It's a good feeling to know that the generations are growing up, the only trouble is that it makes me realise that time passes all too quickly and I have so much more that I want to do, so I must get on and do it...!!!